3 MONTHS - 29 Sept. 2010

WOW, 3 months! How time flies!! The girls are doing great, they are growing and are beautiful. They fit the clothes for 3-month olds, so we guess they are normal size - though the pants are all a bit short, hopefully this just means they'll have long legs:). They are good girls, easy and happy! Liva cries a lot less than she used to, Laia cries a bit more, so it's more or less even now. They only cry when they're hungry, tired or need to be changed. When they're hungry they "tell" us, they make a sound something like "ging", which we assume means food.
Their eye color has changed, it's a really pretty dark blue, kind of like the color of dark blue jeans. They can hold their heads, and when put on their bellies they lift up their head, shoulders and chest.
They don't interact much yet, they don't look at each other and there's no form af communication between them in any way. They like touching each other when they're next to one another, they'll touch hands or put their hand on the other's leg or so. I don't think it'll be long until they'll start communicating a bit - laughing or "talking" together.
Liva talks loads. She'll have deep eye contact and garble away using all the sounds she knows, while smiling and changing her face expression. It's adorable. She has discovered her hands and find them the most fascinating thing ever. She's really good at hitting the dangling toys on their playmats and chairs. It's easy to make her smile, and she has her mother's temper - she can go from smiling to crying to screaming back to smiling all in just a few minutes.
Laia doesn't talk as much, and it's not as easy to make her smile. But when she smiles, she giggles. She has discovered that she can create different sound volumes, when we enter a building she yells, if it echoes she giggles and yells louder. She can grab things and can almost put them in her mouth. She loves putting her hands in her mouth, the deeper the better. She has her father's temper, she doesn't easily show her emotions, but when she does there's no doubt how she feels.
They are very loving girls, they love being held and cuddled - by anyone. They have started "hugging" when picked up, it's a wonderful feeling!
They don't sleep much during the day anymore, 2-3 times, enough for me to shower and get ready in the morning. They sleep really well at night, we put them to bed around 20:00, they sleep until we wake them up around midnight to feed them, then again until 6-ish and again until 8-ish.

As for me, I'm doing good, too. I had reached my pre-pregnancy weight about a month ago, and saw this as the perfect excuse to eat loads of chocolate. But since the girls don't breastfeed much anymore, I can't eat what I want, so I've gained loads of weight again in the past couple of weeks. So now I'm on a ½ diet, which basically means less chocolate and more fruit. I got my period this morning for the first time since becoming pregnant. I guess that's also related to not producing much milk. I feel really bad about not being able to breastfeed my babies, I know it's my own fault, I didn't breastfeed as much as I should at the beginning so now my body isn't producing enough milk. I've tried breastfeeding more this past week, and am pumping milk even though there's nothing to pump. But it doesn't seem to help, there's less and less milk every day:(.
As every new mother, I worry about being a good mother. Besides the breastfeeding, is there anything else I'm doing wrong / could do better? Are they eating enough, sleeping enough, getting enough fresh air? Or are they eating and sleeping too much, getting too much pollution in their lungs? Should I be taking them down to the beach more? Or maybe even out of town? Are they happy? Are they bored? Will they grow up to be happy, confident girls who know their parents adore them? So many questions to which I'll probably never know the answer.
But when they look at us and smile or giggle, their eyes shining, I'm pretty sure they know we are their mommy and daddy and love them with all our heart. And I'm pretty sure they know they are our daughters. And I'm pretty sure they love us, just because we love them. I hope they'll always know they are loved, that they come from a family with a lot of love which extends to their grandparents and aunts, uncles and cousins as well. I hope that whatever we're doing, we're doing right. I hope they know they are my dream come true!

Liva & Laia

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